This last year... well three years have been crazy for me. Made some decisions that have moulded me into what you see now, rightly or wrongly, but I suppose it was and is my destiny.
Death is a serious thing and yet it happens to so many every single day. The affects of losing a loved one cannot be described, you only know when you are there yourself. It changes you and relationships around you. When you see the people that could not be there for you in that hard period, that relationship changes and there is nothing that you can do about it. It doesn't seem to matter that they had a valid excuse or reason as a text costs nothing these days, they come with your price plan and you even get free ones online. My relationships have suffered but only those they proved not to be there. The friendships that have been there have been strengthened and even if it was 'just a text' to say hope all is well and you are in my thoughts those encouraging words were more powerful than you realise and helped me to stay focussed.
In all this God has fed my spirit and kept me involved and working on my passions and my destiny... My path is fulfilled before I have even reached it. Time is just a big 'present' to the ONE who lives outside of time and space so all that has happened, is gonna happen and is happening right now... has already been fulfilled.
I am sure of my happiness and peace and NOTHING will be able to take that away. I will and have come through situations that would make you think it's not gonna happen for me, but I have the faith in knowing if I really want it... it's mine.
Not long ago I wrote a list of I AM... speaking about what I see even if the physical has not manifested in my current time of living and I still stand true to that now.
I AM... all that I want to be and everything that I see...
The mind is so powerful that even if you are 'not well' or imagine voices if you believe it.. it just simply is. No one can tell you any different and that is powerful and also very dangerous is not understood. You can believe in riches and you cause it be by inheritance from the death of a loved one. You can beleive for a partner that gives you everything you need and appears in a person that has to leave a wife and children to be with you. I am learning to be specific...as this power/faith/belief has got me into situations that have caused others pain and this is not my intention.
People will encourage and give advice, good and bad, and you decide if it is for you. How do I do that? Real simple listen to my spirit it's always on point, for some it's God whispering for others it's your gut, but the universe does and always sends messages through people, situations and through your spirit.
There's this email about people being in your life for a reason and season and a lifetime. Even if friends and relationships have been distant or non-existent I have learned something from everyone, it's mind blowing. I am eternally grateful for all that has been shown to me and all that is to come.
I am no longer focussed on people walking in and out of my life as I have an eternal friend that exists within me. That eternal friend has got me when no one else has, this friend has learned to forgive me, has learned to love me, has learned to understand my beauty internally and out, has learned to accept my faults and knows that it is just the way I am at the moment... but that does not mean forever. This friend has faith in me even when my mind sometimes doubts. This friend comforts me in my times of need, keeps me humble with encouraging and supporting words.
To be honest my friend in me connects with you... every time I take in air and breathe out time... my energy feeds you, my words connects with your feelings... I don't intend to hurt but to free you with my honesty. Sometimes it takes time for reality to catch up with the spirit but it really does get there in the end.
In my honesty and my journey I have made some decisions rightly or wrongly but don't ever regret them... this is my destiny and my path... regardless of the decisions I make it will not be taken from me... If it's meant to be this that is exactly what is...
IT WILL BE!!!
YOU WILL BE!!!
There is nothing that can change that... you can fight it... you can even delay it (maybe to the next lifetime who knows) but that LOVE just is
LOVE JUST IS!!!! and when you become ONE with knowing that you find peace, when you become ONE with what just 'IS' you find true fulfilment.
Love is to me not just in an emotion for another person but also for life, lessons we learn, good times we enjoy, EVERYTHING that allows you to exist and function.
Heartache and loss is a part of life, I am still grieving but more rejoicing now and thankful for the gift my grandmother gave me and that still lives on in me.
I am making my own destiny... the one that is already written in my heart, spirit and soul. My heart aches for those who are born into murder, rape, starvation and war, who lives are at risk on a daily basis by violence, drugs and abuse, and yet even in there terror they cry out to the ONE who they believe can give rescue and hope, maybe even in death, perhaps there reward is in the next lifetime and those that afflict and cause harm, there penalty is also in their next existence.
This is my honesty... at this point in my life... I'm calling all those who want to be part of my journey and I yours to be honest and just let it known. I have all the time in the world to embrace real connections but not time at all to waste on false soul/friendship/hater ties... so if your with me then just make a decision to join and if you join with bad intentions I feel sorry for you as Karma is a bitch and my middle name, so I don't worry.... I just focus on being happy.
BLESSINGS
KS x
PS... Don't be scared... you know who you are and I believe that you will get to read this at some point. I am a true friend and I have nothing but LOVE for you and it does not come with terms and conditions x
1. I am happiness
2. I am success
3. I am healthy
4. I am full of positive energy
5. I am an awesome songwriter
6. I am a loving and caring mother
7. I am a daughter to be proud of
8. I am the friend that forgives and comforts you in time of need
9. I am strength
10. I am the person that moves away from soul draining
11. I am the one who detachs herself from anything that kills the spirit
12. I am knowledge
13. I am wisdom
14. I am wealthy
15. I am the wife that is married to the man that deserves nothing but the best
16. I am beauty
17. I am LOVE
18. I am sensual
19. I am comfort
20. I am worthy
Sunday, 6 September 2009
Monday, 6 July 2009
Stop the moaning... KMT!!!!
Always so grateful and thankful for all life's experience's. Life is too precious so much madness sometimes your born into a place of destruction... not being able to even think and make choices dead from before u can even talk... madnesss and then I hear people complain about their lives... madness. I know that when u feel pain its def real to you.. were all human and feel pain.. happiness and things of such matter... and def need to talk it through with a good friend hopefully till u start to feel better about the situation but at least we can make decisions to hopefully make things a little easier.
KS x
KS x
Tuesday, 28 April 2009
Well the cats are behaving so the charity shop is safe for now...
My motto is new and states an element of golden future, not just because the future is bright but golden is the colour of gold lol... meaning Imma bout to step into the circle of 'I am financially wealthy' Bold statement I hear but we go through life with dreams that esteem to being 'comfortable' 'as long as I am comfortable then I am good' some people and myself say but doesn't that equate to being financially secure?
I for one am tired of bills.. they get on my blasted nerves... so I've been expecting cheques and my new thing.. got a big ole ass list... is to watch my 'Success' video... I am gonna try and attach it in here... as it puts me in the right frame of mind, thanks for that Keiron. I swear after watching it things got better not because of the magic video lol but because it got me thinking and believing that it could be me... in reality... I love how the mind works... you pretty much think it and it happens.
I am absolutely amazed by the love and support special people in my life has shown me... we all have our lives and that makes it so much more amazing... words cannot describe how bloody grateful I am... seriously you guys know who you are you're a big massive 'fruit pastille' (my favourite sweetie)in the packet...lol.. seriously ur great and I love you for that....
I aint hating on the 'friends' that haven't been there for me... we all get caught up living life and know that when u need me I will always be there for you... but one thing I don't do is fuckeries... oops hmmmm that's the only way I can describe it cause it proper makes me feel sick... and I don't so sickness... I don't do arguments... I don't do foolishness.. I don't do self righteousness... I don't do two faced (take from you but cuss behind your back)... like I said in TUT TUT.. karma is a bitch and I wont deal with you I will just let life handle you as somethings are done in ignorance and I can't tell the difference but GOD (UNIVERSE) can.
Right now I am getting ready and learning songs for this band... So right now I am about to take a break and cook dinner... mustn't forget I am a mummy and I need to get little man something to eat... to be precise macaroni and cheese (west indian stylee) and roast chicken and yes, love them to bits but not my favourite food in the whole wide world, mushrooms fried in olive oil, garlic, sea salt and butter and then sauteed.. I think that's how u spell it.. anyways I got a special pan for it, hehe.
Next week is a big week for me... I got specials things happening... So agree with me when I say Kyra Simone's future is golden and bright and full of fulfilled promises.
MWAAAAHHH to all my sexy people...
KS x
PS. Question if you dream of kissing a girl... does that mean you're a lesbian? and have straight men ever dreamed sexually in reference to another man... just curious ;) xxxx
CLICK HERE FOR ME
I for one am tired of bills.. they get on my blasted nerves... so I've been expecting cheques and my new thing.. got a big ole ass list... is to watch my 'Success' video... I am gonna try and attach it in here... as it puts me in the right frame of mind, thanks for that Keiron. I swear after watching it things got better not because of the magic video lol but because it got me thinking and believing that it could be me... in reality... I love how the mind works... you pretty much think it and it happens.
I am absolutely amazed by the love and support special people in my life has shown me... we all have our lives and that makes it so much more amazing... words cannot describe how bloody grateful I am... seriously you guys know who you are you're a big massive 'fruit pastille' (my favourite sweetie)in the packet...lol.. seriously ur great and I love you for that....
I aint hating on the 'friends' that haven't been there for me... we all get caught up living life and know that when u need me I will always be there for you... but one thing I don't do is fuckeries... oops hmmmm that's the only way I can describe it cause it proper makes me feel sick... and I don't so sickness... I don't do arguments... I don't do foolishness.. I don't do self righteousness... I don't do two faced (take from you but cuss behind your back)... like I said in TUT TUT.. karma is a bitch and I wont deal with you I will just let life handle you as somethings are done in ignorance and I can't tell the difference but GOD (UNIVERSE) can.
Right now I am getting ready and learning songs for this band... So right now I am about to take a break and cook dinner... mustn't forget I am a mummy and I need to get little man something to eat... to be precise macaroni and cheese (west indian stylee) and roast chicken and yes, love them to bits but not my favourite food in the whole wide world, mushrooms fried in olive oil, garlic, sea salt and butter and then sauteed.. I think that's how u spell it.. anyways I got a special pan for it, hehe.
Next week is a big week for me... I got specials things happening... So agree with me when I say Kyra Simone's future is golden and bright and full of fulfilled promises.
MWAAAAHHH to all my sexy people...
KS x
PS. Question if you dream of kissing a girl... does that mean you're a lesbian? and have straight men ever dreamed sexually in reference to another man... just curious ;) xxxx
CLICK HERE FOR ME
Friday, 20 March 2009
I feel the light...
What's the difference between seeing something and feeling something... It's like seeing your baby growing inside of you but when u feel that kick and turn and when that baby arrives wow, being able to physically feel something its such a special something... feeling that special thing, someone or circumstances... and yeah it's good to feel pain, as long as it don't consume you, you need that as a warning for your health, your spiritual sensing and your sanity or how would you know something just aint right.
Hmmmm I am tired... and I got distracted back another time..lol
KS x
Hmmmm I am tired... and I got distracted back another time..lol
KS x
Thursday, 12 March 2009
TUT TUT
Well I didn't know what to call it... but that def seems to be my motto right now... wot is going on in the world... one minute people are showing love and the next there is confusion and madness and no rasss love...
People (friends on FB) have been expressing their feelings and feel that it's them against the world. Some have said 'Rely on no one' or 'Everyone lets you down'. wow strong statements. But then why do we continue to put trust in people, who quite frankly sometimes don't deserve it, to be let down time and time again. Is there anyone out there that can say they have a friend that has been there for them and is there anyone you can say you have wholeheartedly been there for them too. Maybe it's impossible... that the best friend may 'slip' and let you down and not even realise it perhaps.
I love the idea of trusting people but it's not like the movies and selfishness seems to be fashionable right now... My gran once told me that you have to put yourself first because if you're not well you can't help anyone. It seems that this 'selfish fashion' has been advertising hard and confusing selfish with self preservation so that you can enhance you and others. And I would like to add being a good person doesn't require boasting.. it definitely should be rewarded... but what happened to actions are louder than words? Do I detect that some maybe thinking good deeds shouldn't be rewarded!!!! Well we all believe you reap what you sow so why if you sow goodness should you be rewarded with nothing? If you plant on good soil and you look after your crop, water the plants and treat them in the way they should be treated you will be rewarded with great wheat or fruits or nuts or whatever it is you're looking after. So I am thankful of this law, why should anything we do be in vain? And PRAISE GOD!! when someone does you wrong (with hate and no remorse, bile in the pit of their stomach and spitting and vomiting in your face) should they also not be rewarded with some sort of punishment?
Call it Karma.. biblical law.. law of attraction... most people know that you reap what you sow. How do you feel about it? Does life teach you that there is this force or law that punishes you with consequence? What do you think?
KS x
People (friends on FB) have been expressing their feelings and feel that it's them against the world. Some have said 'Rely on no one' or 'Everyone lets you down'. wow strong statements. But then why do we continue to put trust in people, who quite frankly sometimes don't deserve it, to be let down time and time again. Is there anyone out there that can say they have a friend that has been there for them and is there anyone you can say you have wholeheartedly been there for them too. Maybe it's impossible... that the best friend may 'slip' and let you down and not even realise it perhaps.
I love the idea of trusting people but it's not like the movies and selfishness seems to be fashionable right now... My gran once told me that you have to put yourself first because if you're not well you can't help anyone. It seems that this 'selfish fashion' has been advertising hard and confusing selfish with self preservation so that you can enhance you and others. And I would like to add being a good person doesn't require boasting.. it definitely should be rewarded... but what happened to actions are louder than words? Do I detect that some maybe thinking good deeds shouldn't be rewarded!!!! Well we all believe you reap what you sow so why if you sow goodness should you be rewarded with nothing? If you plant on good soil and you look after your crop, water the plants and treat them in the way they should be treated you will be rewarded with great wheat or fruits or nuts or whatever it is you're looking after. So I am thankful of this law, why should anything we do be in vain? And PRAISE GOD!! when someone does you wrong (with hate and no remorse, bile in the pit of their stomach and spitting and vomiting in your face) should they also not be rewarded with some sort of punishment?
Call it Karma.. biblical law.. law of attraction... most people know that you reap what you sow. How do you feel about it? Does life teach you that there is this force or law that punishes you with consequence? What do you think?
KS x
Monday, 23 February 2009
Hmmmmmm.....
I keep forgetting bout dis ting ya here... I think its been uncovered by some... I suppose in a way it's a secret but not really cause it's on the internet... My exercise today for motivation is making statements of what I understand myself to be..
I AM is the most powerful way to acknowledge what it is you are even if the physical doesnt represent that right now.. remember the life and the life others live before and after are a big sense of current exisitng.. i.e a big 'present' 'current' time is man's way of measuring things... so if thats the case then wotever we think we will become in 'time' has already happened :).. so here it is
1. I am happiness
2. I am success
3. I am healthy
4. I am full of positive energy
5. I am an awesome songwriter
6. I am a loving and caring mother
7. I am a daughter to be proud of
8. I am the friend that forgives and comforts you in time of need
9. I am strength
10. I am the person that moves away from soul draining
11. I am the one who detachs herself from anything that kills the spirit
12. I am knowledge
13. I am wisdom
14. I am wealthy
15. I am the wife that is married to the man that deserves nothing but the best
16. I am beauty
17. I am LOVE
18. I am sensual
19. I am comfort
20. I am worthy
Ok that's it for now... hey if you fimd this comment and maybe you can inspire me with your 'I AM' statements.
That's it for now
Still wrestling with them damn cats lol... but hey working 'I AM' not gonna piss in the hse statements with them.
Bless
KS x
I AM is the most powerful way to acknowledge what it is you are even if the physical doesnt represent that right now.. remember the life and the life others live before and after are a big sense of current exisitng.. i.e a big 'present' 'current' time is man's way of measuring things... so if thats the case then wotever we think we will become in 'time' has already happened :).. so here it is
1. I am happiness
2. I am success
3. I am healthy
4. I am full of positive energy
5. I am an awesome songwriter
6. I am a loving and caring mother
7. I am a daughter to be proud of
8. I am the friend that forgives and comforts you in time of need
9. I am strength
10. I am the person that moves away from soul draining
11. I am the one who detachs herself from anything that kills the spirit
12. I am knowledge
13. I am wisdom
14. I am wealthy
15. I am the wife that is married to the man that deserves nothing but the best
16. I am beauty
17. I am LOVE
18. I am sensual
19. I am comfort
20. I am worthy
Ok that's it for now... hey if you fimd this comment and maybe you can inspire me with your 'I AM' statements.
That's it for now
Still wrestling with them damn cats lol... but hey working 'I AM' not gonna piss in the hse statements with them.
Bless
KS x
Thursday, 15 January 2009
Been a While init!!!!
Well my back is killing me.. had a small car accident nuttin big.. some schooopid eddiaattt drove into the back of me whilst I was stationary... I dunno man some people... Being in the internet cafe dont help me either!!!! its causing more aching...
jus needed to offload here again... things are nice for a change but not great!!!! I suppose with change comes adjustments and sometimes old habits are hard to break.. but one thing I do know is that bad habits are no good and I know what I want so it's all about staying focussed... and that I am indeedy.
It's my birthday on the 21st wohoooo!!! It's my chance to catch up with old friends and have a little chin wag over dinner... some of them its been so long they dont even know my gran has passed away... wow... funny how life can keep you busy but still you have different friends for different reasons and sometimes you dont get to see them as much but it doesnt mean you dont care about them.
Right MEN... pay attention if you read this... please my focus right now is my music not looking for relationship, husband, sex ting, nuttin jus a best friend that could posssibly lead to summit else but pls dont crowd me I dont do well when I feel pressured also dont ignore me either lol... I get easily distracted if you show no emtotion what so ever. But I did say to Graeme that I would focus more as I noticed that when I get invovled or dating I give alot and then I can become emotionally exhausted.. not no more... unless u add to mine and me to u... its not gonna happen... so please bear that in mind..... I still feel like I haven't quite explained myself... and plus no one really knows about this so I guess I am putting this out to the universe... If your my Clyde... let me know... but I am old fashioned so I guess what I am saying is things have to move slow... but not dont be long!!! hehehehe I love being a woman.
My dreams are getting too much... I dreamt someone was drinking my blood it was my dad then it changed and my brother tried to keep the door unlocked but it wasnt until I woke up that I realised that cause I remember him faffing about with the lock from the outside and I was like why is he unlocking the door... was a madness.. u could say I have been watching too much charmed lol... but I have been having those kinda dreams lately... and they have gotten more intense since that record label contacted me... maybe change is happening right now.. hmmmmmmm.... well the package is gone so let's see what NY is saying. Ok BRB I am gonna look it up.
ok 1. To dream that you are bleeding or losing blood, signifies that you are suffering from exhaustion or that you are feeling emotionally drained. It may also denote bitter confrontations between you and your friends. Your past actions has come back to haunt you. Women often dream of blood or of someone bleeding, shortly before or during their periods or while they are pregnant.
To dream that others are bleeding, signifies an emotional cry for help.
2. blood - A sign of life. Killing scene with blood: Enforces the notion that something is ended or finished.
3. Vampire
To see a vampire in your dream, symbolizes seduction and sensuality, as well as fear and death. The vampire represents contrasting images of civilized nobility and aggression/ferocity. It may depict someone in your waking life whose charm may ultimately prove harmful. Deep down inside you know that this person is bad for you, yet you are still drawn to it. Vampires also sometimes relate to decisions about sex and losing your virginity. Alternatively, to see a vampire suggests that you are feeling physically or emotionally drained. The vampire may also be symbolic for someone who is addicted to drugs or someone in an obsessive relationship.
To dream that you are a vampire, signifies that you are sucking in the life energy of others for your own selfish benefit. (WELL I WASNT THE VAMPIRE I WAS THE VICTIM AND THERE WERE TWO ONE WAS A WOMAN SUCKING BLOOD FROM MY WRIST AND THE MAN WAS SUCKING BLOOD FROM MY NECK ERRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!! THERE WERE PEOPLE I TRUSTED I.E. MY DAD BUT THEN IT TURNED IT SOMEONE ELSE DIDNT RECOGNISE THEM Madness!!!!! If you're reading this what do you think? ;)
Anyways... Hopefully I will be back very soon with good news all round.. hahaha and also I have written some more poetry... the flow jus keeps coming... sometimes when I read back what I have written I am frightened at how awesome it is and think SHIT!!!! can I top that one.. I guess it's about thoughts and expressions not just about wording and because I write from the heart not trying to mimick or be anyone else I will always write in that style.
Well My time in the internet is nearly finished... miss ya MR CLYDE!!!!
Love Bonnie
XX
jus needed to offload here again... things are nice for a change but not great!!!! I suppose with change comes adjustments and sometimes old habits are hard to break.. but one thing I do know is that bad habits are no good and I know what I want so it's all about staying focussed... and that I am indeedy.
It's my birthday on the 21st wohoooo!!! It's my chance to catch up with old friends and have a little chin wag over dinner... some of them its been so long they dont even know my gran has passed away... wow... funny how life can keep you busy but still you have different friends for different reasons and sometimes you dont get to see them as much but it doesnt mean you dont care about them.
Right MEN... pay attention if you read this... please my focus right now is my music not looking for relationship, husband, sex ting, nuttin jus a best friend that could posssibly lead to summit else but pls dont crowd me I dont do well when I feel pressured also dont ignore me either lol... I get easily distracted if you show no emtotion what so ever. But I did say to Graeme that I would focus more as I noticed that when I get invovled or dating I give alot and then I can become emotionally exhausted.. not no more... unless u add to mine and me to u... its not gonna happen... so please bear that in mind..... I still feel like I haven't quite explained myself... and plus no one really knows about this so I guess I am putting this out to the universe... If your my Clyde... let me know... but I am old fashioned so I guess what I am saying is things have to move slow... but not dont be long!!! hehehehe I love being a woman.
My dreams are getting too much... I dreamt someone was drinking my blood it was my dad then it changed and my brother tried to keep the door unlocked but it wasnt until I woke up that I realised that cause I remember him faffing about with the lock from the outside and I was like why is he unlocking the door... was a madness.. u could say I have been watching too much charmed lol... but I have been having those kinda dreams lately... and they have gotten more intense since that record label contacted me... maybe change is happening right now.. hmmmmmmm.... well the package is gone so let's see what NY is saying. Ok BRB I am gonna look it up.
ok 1. To dream that you are bleeding or losing blood, signifies that you are suffering from exhaustion or that you are feeling emotionally drained. It may also denote bitter confrontations between you and your friends. Your past actions has come back to haunt you. Women often dream of blood or of someone bleeding, shortly before or during their periods or while they are pregnant.
To dream that others are bleeding, signifies an emotional cry for help.
2. blood - A sign of life. Killing scene with blood: Enforces the notion that something is ended or finished.
3. Vampire
To see a vampire in your dream, symbolizes seduction and sensuality, as well as fear and death. The vampire represents contrasting images of civilized nobility and aggression/ferocity. It may depict someone in your waking life whose charm may ultimately prove harmful. Deep down inside you know that this person is bad for you, yet you are still drawn to it. Vampires also sometimes relate to decisions about sex and losing your virginity. Alternatively, to see a vampire suggests that you are feeling physically or emotionally drained. The vampire may also be symbolic for someone who is addicted to drugs or someone in an obsessive relationship.
To dream that you are a vampire, signifies that you are sucking in the life energy of others for your own selfish benefit. (WELL I WASNT THE VAMPIRE I WAS THE VICTIM AND THERE WERE TWO ONE WAS A WOMAN SUCKING BLOOD FROM MY WRIST AND THE MAN WAS SUCKING BLOOD FROM MY NECK ERRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!! THERE WERE PEOPLE I TRUSTED I.E. MY DAD BUT THEN IT TURNED IT SOMEONE ELSE DIDNT RECOGNISE THEM Madness!!!!! If you're reading this what do you think? ;)
Anyways... Hopefully I will be back very soon with good news all round.. hahaha and also I have written some more poetry... the flow jus keeps coming... sometimes when I read back what I have written I am frightened at how awesome it is and think SHIT!!!! can I top that one.. I guess it's about thoughts and expressions not just about wording and because I write from the heart not trying to mimick or be anyone else I will always write in that style.
Well My time in the internet is nearly finished... miss ya MR CLYDE!!!!
Love Bonnie
XX
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